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Dating Again… Getting Back to Dating

For most of us, there is some point in our lives when we must make the life-altering decision to get back into dating again. Whether it be a nasty divorce, a long relationship that went awry, or a widow getting on with their lives, at some point, we simply have to start dating again.

Getting back to dating can be a daunting proposition for anyone. Generally, the longer one has been out of the dating scene, the more difficult the whole process seems at a glance. However, it doesn’t have to be this way. Dating should be a fun, enjoyable and exhilarating experience.

The first thing resuming daters need to know is that things have changed a lot. That’s actually the scary part for most, but if you know a little about these things, it doesn’t have to be a constricting element of dating again.

Perhaps the most significant change to the dating scene in the last 10 years is the prospect of online dating. Sure, online dating was around more than 10 years ago, but at that time, it was considered a haven for geeks and computer nerds who couldn’t find like-minded individuals in their every day life. Nowadays, online dating has become an accepted, normal and widely popular form of dating.

Maybe online dating doesn’t seem like the right option for you, but this doesn’t mean you should discount the opportunity altogether. If you’re nervous, have no confidence and lack the self-esteem to get out in the real world and start dating again, an online dating forum can be the perfect cure.

Online daters have the chance to get to know people, learn how to flirt all over again, and respond to flirts in turn. One can become a good conversationalist and, in time, regain the confidence and self-esteem necessary to successfully start dating again.

There are three key elements to getting back to dating, and they are:

1. Don’t Compare To Past Relationships

When you start dating again, be very careful not to compare your new potential mates to your past mates. If your past mate was an incredible person, as in the case of many widows, you’ll never find someone who truly stacks up to that person. It’s an impossible goal. If your past relationship was a terrible one, of course you don’t want to find the same qualities, but don’t base the new mates character on that of your ex’s persona.

2. Set Reasonable Standards

A lot of people make this mistake. Don’t set your standards too high, or you could spend years looking for that special someone. Decide what it really is that can make you happy. More often than not, it’s the personality that means the most, not the outward appearance. You can set some standards there, but don’t close yourself off to too many possibilities.

3. Be Confident In Who You Are

Confidence is a natural attractant. If you are confident in yourself as a person – who you are, what you look like, etc. – others will naturally be drawn to you. It can be difficult to ascertain such an outlook on life when you’re feeling lonely or down in the dumps to begin with, but you have to find a way if you want to get back into dating again. Hang around with positive people. You’ll feed off that energy. Buy a new wardrobe or make-up, get a fresh hair cut, do something that will make you appreciate yourself more and others will gain appreciation for you as well.

As we mentioned before, online dating is a great way to get your confidence back. Don’t worry about rejections and emails that get no response. Simply ignore those and know that it happens a hundred thousand times a day to all sorts of people. They mean nothing. Heed our advice, focus on the goal and you should have no problem getting yourself back into the dating scene, full steam ahead.

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